The whole point of watching movies is to enjoy them; however, sometimes, we can end up feeling like we have to suffer through a movie, and it can feel a lot less like pleasure and a lot more like pain.
Here, we look at what movies you must avoid to experience more pleasure and less pain.
The Cure for Insomnia
It’s hard to believe, but this movie is actually 85 hours long. I guess they got the title right anyway, as this film is a surefire way to put anyone to sleep.
The Longest Movie Ever
This film is legendary among cinematic fanatics purely for its shockingly long running time. But we find it hard to believe that anyone has watched the entire thing.
This movie doesn’t follow the traditional plot structure of the film industry as we know it. Four days’ worth of film footage is quite an achievement by anyone’s standards, and it mainly consists of a poet named L.D. Groban reading through 4,080 pages of his poems, intermixed with some X-rated footage and rock music videos.
The Irishman
Despite its excellent cast and three Golden Globe nominations, this movie makes the list of films that can feel like you have to suffer through watching them for several reasons.
Feels Like You’ve Seen It Before
You would think that any movie starring Robert De Niro and Al Pacino would automatically be a dream to watch; however, this film ends up feeling like a mashup of Scorsese’s best gangster films, and leaves audiences feeling like they have already seen this movie before.
A lack of originality makes the extra-long run time of 3 hours and 29 minutes feel way too long.
Pearl Harbor
This film has a cult following; in many people’s eyes, it’s a brilliant movie. But truth be told, you would need to be a super fan to have the stamina to stick with it for the full three hours.
Too Long, Too Noisy and Too Unoriginal
This film mainly consists of battle scenes, and you could be forgiven for thinking that you’re watching footage from any global conflict in the 20th century as it all blends into one big generic battle.
The New York Daily News even criticized the movie for feeling like “A noisy, persistent bomb.”
Despite the state-of-the-art special effects, a well-known story, and spectacular displays of what real war looks like, this movie lacks originality. The bombing scenes are just too long and too noisy, making them a struggle to endure, especially for over three hours.
Cleopatra
It is possibly one of the most famous movies ever, both for its captivating historical storyline and also for the on-screen real love affair between Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton. However, neither of these factors saves this movie from its narcissism.
Too Superficial and Too Long
With stunning sets and intricate costumes depicting Egyptian wealth and luxury, it’s clear that no expense was spared in making this film. The high budget made this movie very aesthetically pleasing to watch, but somehow, it still left audiences feeling unsatisfied by the experience.
As beautiful as this film is, it seems to lack substance, something that becomes apparent during its superlong four-hour run time. This film was criticized for being more like a pretty painting than a Hollywood movie, and no matter how beautiful a painting is, few people want to sit and stare at it for four hours.
The Life of Pi
Despite being nominated for 11 Academy Awards and winning three of them, this movie is just too out there for most people, and its fantastical style makes it challenging to watch.
Too Philosophical
A curious mind is a very important and necessary part of human existence, and philosophy definitely has its place in life. However, when most people sit down to watch a movie, they don’t usually want to jump into a mind-bending examination of the meaning of life.
For all of its brilliance, this movie was criticized for being too wondrous, and it’s not the kind of film that you can sit down and watch after a long day with a box of popcorn. This movie provokes deep existential questioning, and honestly, it’s just too much hard work for most audiences who are looking for something that will bring them some pleasure.
The Human Centipede
This horror movie has such an awful, disturbing concept, we’re honestly not sure why anyone would want to commit to watching it.
Weird, Weird, and Weirder
With one of the weirdest movie plots in history, this film is just too off the wall for anyone to have to suffer through it.
If we must elaborate on its storyline, we can tell you that it’s about a German surgeon who kidnaps tourists and conjoins them, mouth to anus. That’s automatically a no from us, as this movie doesn’t have much more to offer audiences than shock value.
2001: A Space Odyssey
Although this film is still considered an iconic piece of cinema for its time, audiences still find it incredibly hard to watch.
Slow-Paced and Boring
Directed by the acclaimed Stanley Kubrick, the movie depicts the journey of a spaceship to Jupiter to investigate the origins of an ancient artifact.
Filmed in 1968, this movie was quite groundbreaking for its time, but unfortunately, even at its release it was criticized, with The New York Times chief film critic calling it “immensely boring.”
A Wrinkle in Time
This movie lost millions of dollars at the box office, much to the surprise of its Director and Producers, but it just shows you that big budgets and headline names can’t always fill the cracks in a weak movie plot. Not even Oprah could save this movie, and that’s saying something.
Weak Concept and a Lost Plot
Praised for its enchanting message of love, family, and self-belief, even all the magic in the kingdom couldn’t save this film from its lack of a strong storyline.
One critic quoted on Rotten Tomatoes said, “The concept and casting shouldn’t be the most magical parts of a fantasy film, no matter how enchanting its message is.”
A directionless and flimsy plot makes A Wrinkle in Time more likely to give you wrinkles on your face as you try to figure out the point of this movie, so it’s a no from us.
Star Trek: The Motion Picture
This movie is an original Star Trek offering, and it also includes the famous characters of Spock (Leonard Nimroy) and James T. Kirk (William Shatner), making it hard to criticize.
But, I’m afraid to say that audiences found this movie to be quite a drag.
Slow, Boring, with a Dull Plot
Directed by Robert Wise, the film sees the Star Trek crew embark on a mission to stop a giant alien force that’s on a collision course with Earth. With an audience score of only 42% on Rotten Tomatoes, this film definitely lacked something.
Hulk
This film is still regarded as one of the worst installments of the Marvel movie franchise. Criticized for its poor special effects and dodgy CGI, the film disappointed many Marvel fans in 2003.
A Dull and Disappointing Film
One of the main criticisms of this film was the poor CGI. The special effects are so poor that the Hulk just doesn’t look believable, and it really detracted from the movie.
This, coupled with a weak script and dull narrative, makes this movie long and tedious.
The Happening
Many critics have played upon the irony of this movie’s title and criticized the fact that there really doesn’t seem to be much happening in it.
Not Much Happening
According to Rotten Tomatoes, Mark Wahlberg and Zoey Deschanel were both horribly miscast in this movie, and the negative reviews don’t end there. With an audience rating of only 24%, this film left many severely underwhelmed.
As the lead actors (Walhberg and Deschanel) attempt to evade an inexplicable apocalyptic threat that’s sweeping across the country, the film appears to unravel. It exposes a weak plot and directionless storyline, with many left waiting for something to happen for over an hour and a half.
